The sage was known to be compassionate to people who suffered.
At the same time he refused to help those who would not do their part to resolve their problems. He would be direct and unsparing in his responses to them.
“Sometimes compassion comes in the form of a kick in the rear,” is how he would explain his approach.
(Francis J Valloor: A Dewdrop in the Ocean. Mumbai: Awareness Arc, 2009. pg. 154)
A woman said that after many struggles and heartbreaks she was finally happy. “I wish I could keep it this way and never lose it.”
“Try not to possess it, only let it be present,” the sage suggested. “The shores don’t own the ocean, nor the river banks the water that passes between them. Happiness is there in the moment, free of ownership and as delicate as a morning flower.”
( (Francis J Padinjarekara: A Dewdrop in the Ocean. Mumbai: Awareness Arc, 2009)
The day’s newspapers and television carried reports of a well-known religious leader in a war ravaged country, movingly cry out, “God, where were you when innocent people were massacred? Why were you silent?”
The sage was not impressed. “This is only sentimental drama to deflect his own remorse,” he remarked. “The fool doesn’t realise that God would have acted if religious leaders were fearless.”
A man had squandered his wealth for several years. He neglected his family, health and well being. Friends and relatives had tried to help him but he continued on his downward spiral.
“After all our efforts he has not budged one bit and I know he is suffering too,” a close friend acknowledged sadly. “When will he begin to change?”
“Obviously he hasn’t suffered enough,” was the sage’s comment.
(( (Francis J Padinjarekara: A Dewdrop in the Ocean. Mumbai: Awareness Arc, 2009. pg. 104)
“How can I be a successful leader?” a young CEO asked.
“By being fully present.”
“Does that mean I have to be everywhere and micromanage?”
“That would be impossible and inadvisable,” the sage responded. “Being present is first of all being with yourself. Then you’ll see clearly, truly understand and act courageously.” ( (Francis J Padinjarekara: A Dewdrop in the Ocean. Mumbai: Awareness Arc, 2009. pg. 205)
Our great gift is our capacity to be present. We say about some people that they have a great presence. That is possible when our mind and heart are also present where our body is. That may sound quite easy, but that is a major challenge for most human beings. We are here in body but somewhere else in our minds. We may be wishing we were elsewhere. We may be working out plans for the future. Or we are stuck somewhere in the past.
Our presence, our ability to be fully there in the here and now is very powerful. It is our presence that brings great energy, clarity and peace. Facing the challenges of life is possible only with our presence. We cannot be successful in life without being present. Intimacy is our presence to another person. Self-love or confidence is our presence to ourselves.
A high school teacher was quite intense in his speech and attitude. After listening to the sage for a while he realised, “I want peace more than anything else, but I see how disturbed I am in life. It’s as if wherever I turn something upsets me: I turn on the TV or read the papers, I’m upset. I talk to people, I get annoyed. I go to work and there is no peace.”
“The primary reason for your disturbance and disquiet is your demand that reality be different from the way it is,” explained the sage. “The moment you accept the way things are, you’re at peace.” (Francis J Padinjarekara: A Dewdrop in the Ocean. Mumbai: Awareness Arc, 2009. pg. 82)
Everyone who is disturbed or unhappy has one thing in common – the difficulty in coming to terms with reality. The biggest battle we are engaged in is the fight against what is, a fight where the winner is already known.
Awareness is seeing what is directly and openly. Life is what it is whether we like it or not. Other people are the way they are whether we are pleased or displeased. A Zen master put it beautifully: Reality is what it is if you understand. Reality is what it is if you don’t understand.
A visitor, distressed by many painful life events, was searching for peace. He had tried religion, meditation and psychotherapy, but none of that had helped. He wanted to get away from it all and be at peace.
“Your conflict is between what is and what is not,” the sage explained to him. “You are trying to find peace by escaping what is, but that never works.”
“What can I do to end this conflict?” the visitor asked.
“There is only one way you can do that,” the sage answered. “You can find peace only by coming to terms with reality. Steadfastly refuse to look away from what you see.”
((THE OCEAN IN THE DEWDROP – Awakening the Sage within, de Mello Publications, 2010, pg. 12)
